Tough week

I hit a wonderful milestone at Monday's weigh-in. It would seem that doing so tripped my minded to a mode that I've not felt since the Holidays.

It is almost as though some primitive need for fat cell salvation woke up and kicked into over-drive.

This has been a whole week of really bad eating habits and no exercise. I'm supposed to get on the scales tomorrow, but I really don't want to.

As I reflect on the past week, a number of things come to mind--

I'm a little sad.

Sad that I didn't think for more than two seconds about any of the poor choices I made over the past six days.


Sad that, like most addicts, I acted on my poor choices in private.

I also a bit angry

Angry that I would allow myself to throw away eight weeks worth of behavior changing habits, for nothing really. I mean, I didn't even fill myself with really good food--just fattening.

Angry that after a significant investment of time and energy, I really have very little willpower against fastfood breakfast. I have a great deal of willpower after breakfast, in fact I face very little tempation. But I love their breakfast, every fastfood place has something that I just LOVE for breakfast.

But mostly, I'm determined

I am determined to stop those destructive behaviors.

I am determined to regain my positive attitude.

I am determined, that I will be healthy and thin...I will be 192!

I have decided to fast today. I understand that from a weigh-loss view, fasting is not good for you. However, I have to look at it from a long-term view. Mainly, fasting has always had the benefit of getting my mind right. I will come out of this better.

I am 192